At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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