I think I died a long time ago.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize