i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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