it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Rumble strips road head = magical
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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