Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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