When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
