The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
