At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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