I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
