I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
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