You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
