Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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