Texts From Last Night

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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.

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  (412): After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me. http://tfl.nu/f4ue
  Replies (85) Good night (2852) Bad night (709)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  dibs.

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  (203): the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces... (603): dibs. http://tfl.nu/d3kw
  Replies (30) Good night (1023) Bad night (2241)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?

  (1-330): View more from Ohio

  i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok

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  (330): yah i'm on my way- is everything ok? (1-330) i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok http://tfl.nu/s4ag
  Replies (35) Good night (1148) Bad night (7278)
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  (607): View more from New York

  Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?

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  (607): Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved? http://tfl.nu/p303
  Replies (20) Good night (3839) Bad night (1027)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.

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  (830): Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/q7ix
  Replies (10) Good night (4530) Bad night (1063)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...

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  (617): And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not... http://tfl.nu/7o3n
  Replies (13) Good night (1058) Bad night (3634)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.

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  (973): Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested. http://tfl.nu/rwnz
  Replies (1) Good night (1981) Bad night (714)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset

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  (412): I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset http://tfl.nu/cmm6
  Replies (8) Good night (852) Bad night (2211)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language

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  (763): It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language http://tfl.nu/6vub
  Replies (4) Good night (1881) Bad night (1258)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.

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  (701): Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect. http://tfl.nu/4n2p
  Replies (2) Good night (619) Bad night (954)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat

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  (205): Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat http://tfl.nu/n66h
  Replies (1) Good night (810) Bad night (430)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Sure. But we have to be quiet.

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Ninja mode activated

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  (775): Sure. But we have to be quiet. (1-775): Ninja mode activated http://tfl.nu/1wq1
  Replies (5) Good night (1316) Bad night (352)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I am not being the messenger for your booty call.

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.

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  (519): I am not being the messenger for your booty call. (250): I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one. http://tfl.nu/rzt1
  Replies (1) Good night (870) Bad night (321)
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  (469): View more from Texas

  TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.

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  (469): TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low. http://tfl.nu/y5ae
  Replies (0) Good night (557) Bad night (294)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.

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  (602): Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name. http://tfl.nu/98wx
  Replies (2) Good night (571) Bad night (199)

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