What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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