my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone is single if you try hard enough
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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