Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Randomize