this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
