i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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