..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
