WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
