3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Randomize
