When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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