yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
