oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
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