she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
nutella sex= disaster
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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