I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
