True but thats because hes a fetus.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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