oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
