You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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