Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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