sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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