im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
