smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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