Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
