You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize