He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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