the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
