Your dad touched me again.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
