Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
