Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
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I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
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Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
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