If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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