Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize