if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
