maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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