I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize