put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
