I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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