I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
