I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize