Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize