Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize